Contesting the Febrewary Contest Results

Special thanks to Janet and George for letting us rave in their house
during their Wedding Anniversary and on such short notice.  The party
was really great.  We had a ball, and a pretty good sized crowd too.  
We were even joined by a few members who seldom show up!  Must be the 
warming spell we had.

Sorry I didn't get to writing this last Friday.  My recollection may be 
way off by now.  As always, (for new members especially) half of what I 
say is not true.  And the other half is only half true.  That other 
half of that half is an interpretation that may or may not be exactly 
as events occurred.  It's up to you as the reader to determine what 
really happened and what is embellishment.  Two things to remember.  
First, truth is often stranger than fiction.  Second, if half of what I 
say is true, then what if my saying half of what I say is true, isn't 
really true?  Maybe the half that isn't true is actually the half that 
is true! %-)

The food was huge bowls of chili.  Quite good and with pasta, cheese, 
onions, and sour cream on the side.  That way no one could complain 
about not having what they wanted in it!  Everyone had their own bowl 
and it was great.  One person brought the wrong kind of bowl and tried 
to smoke the chili. %-)  Other food was some fruity cake.  Not fruit 
cake, but angel food like cake with fresh fruit on it.  We also had 
some bean dip and chips.  Let's see ... I know we had other food, but 
just can't remember what it was.  Oh yeah, some banana cake I think.  
Sorry about the other food and whoever brought it.  Please impeach the 
scribbler.  He's just waiting for the moment to be replaced!

Speaking of impeachment.  We are once again in need of a victim, err, 
I mean a president for life.  Since our latest choice has already 
abandoned us for the pursuit of knowledge.  What a waste.  Like that 
will get him anywhere useful in life!  Beer be all I needs!  Well, 
that and a ... plastic blow up doll.

We also had beverages to drink.  There was a penta-berry drink from 
Dan.  I remember it because it was first.  That was followed by the 
cherry bounce.  Both were great as always.  We may have experienced 
the last of the cherry bounce since the tree is dead.  :-(  We also 
had some wines.  We brought a elderberry from 7-8 years ago.  Betty 
brought rhubarb and some veggie wine made with potatoes onions and 
carrots.  I guess you could say it was "dinner" wine.  The beers 
included a couple of commercial Porters and a few individual porters.  
There were also some commercial not-porters for other tastes.  
Something purple this way came too.  Not sure what it was, but it 
looked weird.  Ken and Kim brought a large bottle of some 
one-out-of-2000 beer.  I forget what it was, but am pretty sure I got 
a photo where you can see it yourself.

We had a couple of guests.  George's niece and her friend Mary were 
there.  It's nice to have teenage girls to rave with.  They both 
disappeared and came back an hour later all sweaty.  Not sure exactly 
where they went or what they did.  I got pictures of them too.  Don't 
tell them!  ;-)

A couple people were in the living room on the computer.  I hope none 
of the cool viruses or spy ware programs visited along with all those 
skin tone colored pages that were showing up.  Steve would have been 
in heaven, but he chose to abandon us for kite skiing or something 
like that.  I say we fire him and no longer accept his 90% discount 
coupons.  From now on we all pay full price plus 10%.  We'll show him!

So you already heard about the results of the Porter Contest.  What 
you didn't hear is how the winner rigged the contest.  She did all the 
pouring and serving.  She also listened to all the judging comments.  
I heard her trying to influence them as they were judging too!  When 
she wasn't happy with the results, she added just one more beer.  A 
second serving of her own.  She put some secret ingredient in it that 
influenced the judges and made them forget what they wrote the first 
time.  I was there and saw it happen.  There was a blue mist coming 
from the glasses and suddenly everyone stopped moving.  I saw Betty 
walk over and edit all the comment sheets.  I couldn't move to stop 
her.  Then as quickly as it came, the blue mist disappeared back into 
the glasses and everyone started moving again.  It was really strange.

After the porter contest, we decided to have a "Porter Emptied Now 
Into Slush" contest.  We abbreviated it using the first letters of each 
word.  This is a tool used to recycle porter beer into slushy snow.  We 
argued for a while about the logistics.  We tried blindfolds, but the 
women protested that Appearance was an important quality to be judged.  
So we tried a sheet of plywood, but it was preventing the full Aroma 
from being experienced.  In the end, we just went with a cluster (cough) 
and the tools were judged randomly.  Brian tried to participate, but the 
men insisted he couldn't be a judge.  Ken won by a teeny weenie.  Or was 
it by just an inch?  I can't remember exactly, but we were all surprised 
by this upset.  In case you are wondering, Sue came up with the contest 
rules.  She used the beer judging forms.  The scores were based on 
Aroma, Appearance, Flavor, Mouthfeel, and Overall Impression.  I think 
she said Mouthfeel was the key to winning.

Next month is at Tom and Sarah's.  Remember to bring your portable seats.  
It'll be cozy and fun.  Tom's gonna brew beer too.  An extract for the 
next club contest.  We'll also have a "Beautiful Real Extravagant Amazing 
Super Twins" contest next month.  I'm looking forward to winning that one.  
;-)  But I think we'll have to serve a lot of Cream and/or Milk Stouts to 
compare them to.

A Good Beer To All, And To All A Good Beer!

Jeff Kane